“CHRISTIAN PIMPS” – a HARD WORD
-by Coach Dave Daubenmire.
QUOTE- “Christianity started in Palestine as a fellowship; it moved
to Greece and became a philosophy; it moved to Italy and became
an institution; it moved to Europe and became a culture; it came
to America and became an enterprise.” -Sam Pascoe.
“An enterprise. That’s a business.” …. “A business? But isn’t it
supposed to be a body?” I could not envision where this line of
questioning was going, and the only response I could think of was,
“Yes.” She continued, “But when a body becomes a business, isn’t
that a prostitute?” – As told by David Ryser.
I’ve been fighting for a long time the prompting of my inner man to
take on this subject. Although I have chewed around the edges like
I used to do as a child when I would break off the crust from a hot,
home-made apple pie in attempt to appease my hunger without my
mother finding out, I never really stuck my thumb into the middle of
I have been a sellout. A pimp, if you will. Not on purpose. It is easy
to justify our lack of courage when confronted with difficult issues. I
try to faithfully deliver the mail as the Lord hands it to me, but I have
been negligent by eating the crust out of fear of spoiling the pie.
You see, I have pulled my punches. I have softened the blow. I have
spanked with a newspaper when they deserved a belt. I have sold out
on the Truth. I have not called a spade a spade. I have nibbled at the
crust when I should have been hammering the pie. I have taken the
be-nice approach and have listened to the “touch not God’s anointed”
mentality. I have prostituted the Truth. For that I am sorry.
Oh, my intentions were good. I had hoped that as I exposed the
“unfruitful works of darkness” that the churches would eventually
awaken and begin to push back against the enemy. After ten years
of trying to awaken “The Church” to the problem I have finally
mustered the courage to say what I have known all along. “The
Church” IS the problem. It has become a pimp, selling the works
of “the body” for personal satisfaction. Most of the pulpits are filled
by “hirelings” (more on that in a future commentary), men and women
who stand in the pulpit without a calling, without an anointing, and
without courage. They are man pleasers, living off of “the Body” as
they sell it out for their own whims and pleasures. Greedy Dogs,
Isaiah called them. Blind watchmen…loving to sleep…leading the
Not all of the churches. If you are a pastor and have read this far then
I am probably not talking about you. I have met many courageous
men who boldly live out the command to “lead them out.” You know
who you are. You are the ones who have been criticized, belittled,
and called names by the “pimp in the pulpit” at the big church
You see, to him, the church is a business…an enterprise…a social
club totally dependant on butts and bucks. It is a place to make
business contacts, network with others in the community, and
soothe one’s conscience through weekly attendance and philanthropy.
It is no different from a whore house where a woman’s body is sold
for the pleasure of another. Love-less intercourse is prostitution.
Most church goers love the service that Jesus provides (membership
has its privileges) but don’t really know the Jesus who provides it.
I’ll be honest. I’ve been afraid to say some of these things for fear of
alienating even more pastors. I was afraid that my harshness might
alienate those “frozen chosen” pastors and eliminate opportunities
to “minister” to their congregations. That’s where I have pimped-out
my call. The pastors are not the answer, they are the problem.
Instead of cleaning out Congress perhaps we should start by
cleaning out the pulpit. Judgment begins first in the house of God.
America is a reflection of the churches and the churches are a
reflection of the pulpits. It is time to “throw the bums out”…even if
they do hide behind the “touch not my anointed.” When a football
team is under-performing who gets the boot? Yep, the coach.
Allow me to be frank as I cut to the chase. Pick up your family
and get out of the mausoleum you are attending and find a place
that serves the Lord. I couldn’t care less how many generations
your family has been a member, how many pews your family has
donated, and how many of your friends attend. Sitting on your
butt every Sunday is not serving the Lord, it is the Lord serving
you. The feel-good Gospel is a fraud. Jesus taught self-sacrifice
not self-fulfillment. “Greater love has no man than thisthan he
would lay down his life for his friends….” Love demands sacrifice.
What have you sacrificed for your faith? You are engaging in
Spiritual welfare…living off of the efforts of others.
Start fighting back by no longer giving them your money. Don’t
allow them to hit you over the head with the “bring all of the tithes
into the storehouse” hammer without asking yourself some very
important questions. What is a storehouse and what is its purpose?
What does the Scripture mean by “meat in my house” and who is
the meat for? Are there families in your “church” who are losing
their homes? Is that not who the “meat in the house” was stored
up for or were the storehouse funds used for a new parking lot?
Is the purpose of the tithe (by the way, my wife and I believe in
tithing) to pay senior pastors, associate pastors, youth ministers,
worship leaders, and secretaries to do “ministry?” Can’t you “tithe”
different places? Did the New Testament church teach the concept
of “professional” Christians or were the elders of the church also
tent-makers? Does “meat in my house” mean bigger buildings,
paved parking lots, and padded pews? Is your “church” experiencing
a budget crunch right now because they have eaten the meat that
should have been placed in the storehouse? I know, “let them eat
Is storehouse money supposed to be spent on the already converted
or on seeking and saving that which is lost? What percent of your
church’s budget go to “missions”…as if that is a separate job…in
comparison to utilities, paper, salaries, and operating expenses?
Don’t stop giving, just change where you give. Find a ministry that
is using the money to reach out to the community and send your
tithe there. Remember, it is the “Lord’s house” into which your
finances are to be offered….not some social club to which your
tithe is nothing more than monthly dues. It is time you asked
yourself if the Spirit still dwells in your church.
My wife and I have spent the last few weeks reading the book of
Acts in our morning devotionals. You should do the same. They
spread the Gospel around the world at great personal peril and
sacrifice. The self-serving American-Church is a pathetic step-child
to Christianity’s founding fathers.
Most churches love money, chase money, compromise over money.
A pastor in New York was just fired from his $600,000 salary! The
national average for pastors is $84,426! No wonder they won’t
speak against sin! Why not include those wealthy homosexuals
in the congregation!
People have asked me to start a church. I tell them that they are
nuts. Truth empties churches, it doesn’t fill them. My friend Flip
Benham says guys like me would be the Dr. Kervorkian of church
growth. What man of God would want to wipe noses when he could
fight evil? No thanks. At least on the streets I can recognize the
“And as they departed, Jesus began to say unto the multitudes
concerning John, What went ye out into the wilderness to see? A
reed shaken with the wind? But what went ye out for to see? A man
clothed in soft raiment? Behold, they that wear soft clothing are in
kings’ houses.” Yep, the pimps are the ones wearing the nice
clothes. Funny isn’t it? The pimps in the pulpits accuse street
preachers of being undignified.
What did Jesus say about the ultimate street preacher John the
Baptist? “Verily I say unto you, among them that are born of
women there hath not risen a greater than John the Baptist.”
Take the time to read what Jesus had to say to the religious pimps
of His day!
We’re heading next week to do ministry work on the streets of Las
Vegas…That’s right, we are Christian street-walkers…
You probably won’t find me speaking in any churches anytime
© 2009 Dave Daubenmire – All Rights Reserved.
Coach Dave Daubenmire is host of the high octane Pass The Salt
radio show heard in Columbus, Ohio. In 1999 Coach Daubenmire
was sued by the ACLU for praying with his teams while coaching
high school in Ohio. He now spends his energy fighting for Christian
principles in the public domain.